Krishnamurti & the Art of Awakening

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Krishnamurti Quote of the Day

Sarobia, Pennsylvania | Notes from Sarobia discussions 1940

Relationship acts as a mirror to reflect all the states of our being, if we allow it; but we do not allow it as we want to conceal ourselves; revelation is painful. In relationship, if we become aware, both the unconscious and the conscious states are revealed. This self-revelation ceases when we "use" people as needs, when we "depend" upon them, when we "possess" them. Mostly relationship is used to cover our inner poverty; we try to enrich this psychological poverty by clinging to each other, flattering each other, limiting love to each other, and so on. There is conflict in relationship, but instead of understanding its cause and so transcending it, we try to escape from it and seek gratification elsewhere.

Tags: conflict, relationship

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When we suffer we seek immediate consolation, comfort, and therefore there is no longer questioning; there is no longer doubt, but mere acceptance.
The moment we have solved one problem, another arises, and so we continue to the end of our lives seeking solutions to an endless series of problems.
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Do not try to be spiritual, for you do not know what that signifies at all.
Heaven knows, we have conflicts all day long, but we have trained our mind to be cunning, and so pass over these conflicts lightly, escape from them.
Through friction, through continual conflict, memory is being created, memory as the "I" and the "mine", which becomes possessive.
Conflict can exist only between two false things, between that supposed reality which you call the "I", which to me is nothing else but the result of environment, and the environment itself.
You have not solved conflict, you have merely shifted it by substituting a new environment, a new condition, which will in turn produce further conflict.
If you look into your lives, you will see that conflict is continually twisting, perverting, shaping your lives;
There can be struggle only between two false things, conflict between the environment and the result of environment which is the "I".
Some people believe that the "I" has had a birth in the distant past and will continue in the future. It is irrelevant to me, it has no significance at all.
You know we have lost all sense of living normally, simply, directly.
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In times of peace and quietness, there takes place a gradual change of values, mostly unconscious, and this change, this gradual change, we term the struggle between the old and the young.
How is one to have this intelligence which destroys struggle and conflict and the ceaseless effort which wears out mind itself?
When the mind is not imparting values, which is mere conformity, when there is spontaneous understanding of the prison, which is environment, then there is the action of intelligence, which is freedom.
The turmoil, the end, and the "you" are the same; there is no division.
The illusion of economic security is shown throughout the world by these depressions, crises, wars, calamities, and chaos.
It is the very essence of stupidity to escape from conflict through a series of established values, or through forming a new set of values.
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Is not liberation from the cause of conflict and sorrow the primary issue?
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Our conflict within and without arises, does it not, from the changing and contradictory values based on pleasure and pain?
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All the conflicting entities which make up the me have also brought into being the other me, the observer, the analyser.
The end to conflict and sorrow is through understanding and transcending the ways of the self and in discovering that imperishable Reality which is not the creation of the mind.
Questioner: Are we worms which must turn into butterflies?
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If good is the opposite of bad, goodness contains the bad because goodness is the result of its opposite, the bad.
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The 'I' is the result of this pursuing and denying, and it is therefore a contradiction.
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It is only in a state of resistance that there can be this consciousness of relationship, which is merely an adjustment between opposing conflicts.
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Is not all existence a question of relationship?
Not finding satisfaction in human relationship we often try to establish it in the realm of theories, beliefs, concepts.
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Self-revelation is only possible in relationship.
Without fully understanding the process of greed, merely to cultivate kindliness, generosity, is to perpetuate ignorance and cruelty; without integrally understanding relationship, merely to cultivate compassion, forgiveness, is to bring about self-isolation and to indulge in subtle forms of pride.
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Conflicts in relationship build a wall of continuous resistance and instead of bringing wider and deeper unity create insurmountable differences and disunity.
To be is to be related; there is no such thing as isolated being.
Is not relationship a mirror in which, if we are aware, we can observe without distortion our private thoughts and motives, our inward state?
Relationship is a living thing and as a living thing it is self-revealing.
Though the right produces religion, worship, etc., yet if you look at it very deeply, you will see that ultimately it denies man's happiness because it produces wars, regimentation and an education that merely shows you what to think, not how to think; yet surely the organized society of the left also denies man's happiness because it is regimented.
"Transform society" is one of our catch-phrases, an easy assertion, that we must do something about the world as though the world were so different from ourselves.
How can we go far unless we understand what is near, the near being our relationship with ourselves and our neighbour, with family, etc.
The relationship of two people creates society; society is not independent of you and me;
We talk about love, we talk about responsibility, duty, but there is really no love, and relationship is based on gratification, the effect of which we see in the present civilization.
We want to bring about alteration through a system or through a revolution in ideas or values, based on a system, forgetting that it is you and I who create society, who bring about confusion or order by the way in which we live.
Without love, relationship is a pain; however gratifying, or however superficial, it leads to boredom, to routine, to habit with all its implications.
If I try to fulfil myself through things, through family, through ideas, then family, names, things and ideas become very important.
There is real thinking only when there is no response to memory.
True revolution can take place only when you, the individual, become aware in your relationship to another.
Society is the product of relationship, of yours and mine together.
To be, is to be related;